Anybody a First Aider?

Hi All,

Things have been going pretty well and smoothly, well until last week ! – We went away to Cornwall for a long weekend and met up with friends, Denise, Dave and Lewis and their two dogs, Eva and Tilly - remember Tilly, I had the hots for her last year, but that was before I had my hormone implant and my grillocks shrivelled up to nothing! We were at a campsite by Padstow and there, they have got a beach which is virtually private, so we all went down and was having a great old time …..

….. now Eva, who is not so old, decided to go for a paddle in the water’s edge and while she was not looking, a great big wave went right over the top and dumped right on her head …. poor old thing, she came out the other side completely shocked by it all. Denise and Dave thought she was in trouble, so dived into the water and was up to their thighs trying to grab her, so that is where I thought I would do my Sir Galahad bit and I rushed in as well ……. It was all a right panic for a couple of seconds, but glad to say, she is fine. They all had a laugh about it and then started to do ballet lessons emptying out their wellies !!

Dave would look even more dapper with a nice pink ballerinas too too on as well !

Anyway, while they are busy draining the water out of all the places it shouldn’t be, Chris, old Fat Boy, thought it only right and proper to play with me on the beach …. now what he didn’t know, is that Tilly and me had hatched a plan …… while he is giving it all “Come on Cody, run around Cody, Fetch Cody ……. Now me, I am quite happy licking up as much sand as I can eat, I pretended and played dumb…. 

Tilly got into position and when Fat Boy turned around, there she was, in just the right position to trip him up ……. now, if that wouldn't have been funny enough, he had his camera in his hand and instead of just stumbling gracefully to the ground, he had to make an ass of himself and proceeded to do a Max Wall tribute act as he travelled about 30 yards across the beach ……. check out the video ……

Fat Boy doing the 30 yard dash !!

You have never seen anything like it …. some short fat bloke, defying gravity by doing a Max Wall at a 45 degree angle nearly the full length of the beach but managing not the brake the camera …. but then ..… as Sir Isaac Newton said “What goes up must come down” …. Chris’s little short legs were eventually overtaken by his big fat belly and whoooooof …. down he went – LAUGH … I didn’t think I was going to stop … he hit hard sand like a ton of bricks …. wallop ….. I bet they recorded about a 7.8 on the Rhichter scale and enough to cause a 20 foot tsunami in the Scilly Isles !! Once the Earth had stopped trembling he moaned and groaned and got to his feet and said “ I think I have broken a rib” … well that made it even funnier …… lots of sympathy from the crowd of onlookers !!

anyway, a week and a half later and he is still in quite a bit of pain with it and insists he can’t Hoover, iron, dig the garden, clean the windows or anything like that ….

Right, I am off, hope your all okay – Take Care – Cody