Third World Problems !

Hi Cody Lovers – How are you all?

It has been quite a long time since we caught up but it’s a job for me to get on the laptop because Chris is always on it !

This blog is titled Third World Problems …… I bet you are wondering what all that is about eh? – Well ….. I think I may have a plan to sort of all the troubles in the Third World ….. How is that you all ask? – Lack of food, over population etc. so how do I come in to this …. well, I am not sure if you remember me telling you we went to Yeovilton Air Day and watched all the planes etc. and stayed there in the motorhome …. well, when we packed up, Chris took me out for a quick walk before we started the journey and I had to go …. because when you gotta go, you gotta go – right? He picked it up in a Dog Poo Bag and put it by the steps of the van for disposal later … anyway, there was no bins or anything nearby, so he hung it on the back of the van to put it in the bin when we drove out of the site. Ideal … we packed up the rest of the gear, put it all in its place and Rhea settled down for the trip home …. I don’t, I am … and I quote “a real pain in the backside” because I won’t lie on my bed, but insist in standing, panting and dribbling for the complete journey, no matter how far we are going !!! – We came back along the A303 and then onto the M5 when we could get up a fair old lick for a big motorhome even reaching the blistering speeds of 80 + …. we then went on the North Devon Link Road which is 60mph and then onto the road home. So how does this all sort out the Third World ? – well they forgot to chuck my bag of dumps away, and when we got home, there is was, still swinging on the back of the van in all it’s glory !!! – Could have been embarrassing if it had dropped off onto the windscreen of a 5 series BMW or better still, a Police Traffic Car …. anyway, my plan is to use doggy crap bags which must be as tough as old boots, only cost about 99p for 200 and make condoms out of them and send them to India …. if they are that tough and can take all the bumping around on the motorway ….. they should stop lots of unwanted brown babies and bingo, all sorted with enough food etc. to go around – Cody, your a genius.

We went for a walk the other week and down in the woods, and Rhea and me were running around like loonies and all of a sudden ….. whoooooosh, one of us had stood on a bloody wasps nest !!!

They were all over us ….. we ran up a path because old fat boy had legged it and left us behind, so we followed him up there, only to find it was a dead end and the only way back was past the nest again !!! – We all got stung to hell … Chris in the arm, his belly (big old target!!) and on the inside of his thigh …. not sure what is talking about but he hopes the pain goes but the swelling stays !!! – I got stung in the side several times and on the face – I looked like I had done a couple of rounds with  Muhammad Ali, although the picture doesn’t really show just how swollen my mush was !!! - and Rhea, well she got several in the side ….and, right next to her butt hole !!! – She nearly won Bullies star prize with a winning score of ONE HUNDRED AND EIGHTY !!! ….. She ran around and around trying to get to it …. I thought she was going to disappear up her own backside ….. it was REALLY scary I can tell you ……. they were swarming all over and because we were up a dead end, we had to fight our way through all the undergrowth and brambles to find a route back without going back down the path …. we eventually found a way out but had an eight foot drop to get back on track.

About the only other thing which has happened is that it was Chris’s Dads Birthday and we took him out for a meal …. they arrived at the restaurant and his Dad made a ‘B’ line for the waiter, shaking his hand, asking him how he was, was everything fine and it was a long time since he had seen him …. it was, they had never been there before !! ….. after explaining what all the things on the menu were, he decided on the curry. His new best mate arrived with it and Wally (Chris Dad) asked why it had got a great big crisp with it …. he normally hardly eats very much and only eats like a bird – that night he was like a bird alright, a bloody vulture and proceeded to down the lot like he hadn’t eaten for a month. When we stood up to go, the people on the next table said hello and Wally and he pounced on them, shaking their hands and telling them all how it was his Birthday tomorrow and he was going to be 100, they went on and on congratulating him and telling him how well he was doing and how he didn’t look that old et. etc. they on for ages ….. a remarkable achievement to still be able to go out for a meal etc. trouble is, it was his birthday the day before and he was 91 not 100 !!!

This was me and Wally when I was younger ………..

Anyway, better be off as me tea is ready ……….. hope your all well and being like Rhea and me and chilling out – think she has taken up flamin’ Yoga !!!!

Take Care – see you soon – Cody xxx